#19 - Intentionality, Part 4: Your Reality is as Good as Anyone Else’s
/In this episode of Being Different Together, Kelly and Nyssa continue their intentionality mini-series by unpacking two powerful Murray Landsman sayings: “Be nice to yourself” and “Your reality is as good as anybody else’s.”
They explore how negative self-talk, shame, and “autoimmune emotions” can impact your mental and physical health, and what it really means to be kinder to yourself without slipping into avoidance or indulgence.
They also dive into subjective reality in relationships—why so many arguments become battles over “who’s right,” how to handle conflict and hard conversations, and how tools like real dialogue and paraphrasing can lower emotional threat and help you truly understand someone you disagree with (about anything from daily annoyances to politics and the pandemic).
If you’ve ever wondered how to stop being mean to yourself, communicate more intentionally, or stay connected when realities collide, this conversation is for you.
Main Topics Covered:
How “be nice to yourself” can quietly transform harsh inner criticism and negative self-talk
Why being mean to yourself is like having an “autoimmune emotional problem”
The surprising difference between mindfulness and intentionality (and why it matters)
Everyday examples of choosing how you want to show up vs. living on autopilot
What “your reality is as good as anybody else’s” really means in relationships
How fights turn into battles over “who wins reality” (and how to step out of that trap)
The hidden emotional threat behind “How could you believe that?” in political and pandemic debates
A simple real dialog tool—paraphrasing—that can instantly cool down conflict
Ways subjectivity and curiosity can create a bridge between very different worldviews
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