Turdy-Uno

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I saw a friend yesterday who said, "So you are going to be "turdy-uno" tomorrow..." I like this reference to turning 31. 

Last year, it felt like a much bigger deal. Turning 30 means one is no longer in the fun-loving decade of the 20s when one was still young, beautiful, and trying to figure out the world. Transitioning from 29 to 30 felt serious, and a bit dreaded. But now that I am turning from 30 to 31, I feel not so serious at all. I see that where youth and beauty matter most are truly in the heart and that figuring out the world is a forever journey, so the things I thought were "ending" can actually never end.

So calling this birthday Turdy-Uno feels so appropriate. 

The wisest among us are also the most playful. I'm glad to be embracing age with a light and open heart. 

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As a note, my blog from a few years ago was attempting to get to this place with the title, Not So Seriously. Check it out. I was still a bit serious back then, and glad to see I've lightened up. 

New Beginnings, New Endings

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Many of us have a preference for beginnings. I know I do. It's the first of the month. I have a *new* resolution to write something everyday. I am excited about a new challenge and about the possibilities of what will emerge. But the real test is to see how I still feel about this venture in a week, month or year when it no longer becomes new and instead is just the way things are. 

It seems that not as many of us have a preference for endings. Some do, but I feel that many of my friends and colleagues also lament the "can't get myself to finish what I start" tendency. But there is something comforting about a bow on a package, the last page in a book, or a tidy room. 

The thing is that anything "finished" will suddenly become something new again. The unwrapping of the gift, the finding of a new book, or the living in the tidy room is what automatically follows. It's like breathing, one breath always leads to the next until the final exhalation which is hopefully many breaths away for most of us. 

So can I diffuse the excitement of new beginnings and the weight of finishing something simultaneously so I fully enjoy the totality of the process? 

Let's see.

The Process of Becoming Never Ends

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There was a quote that I had on my wall for a long time:

Something in the process of becoming both is and is not.

I got this from the book Sophie's World and it's an idea that's followed me around for a long time because, well, it's ever present. Though we tend to think of the world as something seemingly unchanging, its is changing all the time. All the time.

Even from the time I started writing this post my life has shifted in so many ways.

We've opened the store at the new "center," which turns out to be a reinvention of the place we were the whole time we were planning the Upstairs Dream Center. It is funny now that I think of it. The symbolism of planning this thing upstairs that never ended up happening. "Upstairs" representing the realm of thoughts and ideas. Thoughts and ideas are so plentiful that most of them will remain thoughts and ideas. This contrasts with the realm of reality; not imaginings but what is really here. That's more the realm of the ground, earth, first floor. We decided to "bloom where we are planted" and it seems growing will be effortless. 

We had our grand opening for the store last weekend. A few days beforehand I came to the realization that everything wasn't going to get done; meaning, everything I had planned to do (with my thoughts and ideas!) wouldn't all be done. 

And you know what? It was totally okay. In fact, it was still a great success.

I once thought that at a certain point my business (or any other aspect of my life for that matter) would finally be all neat, organized and tied up in a nice little bow. Nope. Life is messy. 

It is not good or bad it is just a part of this whole process of becoming. Seeing it as that, I just marvel at the unfolding. 

I am truly blessed to be on this journey.