In the middle of writing a post for my business website, I am suddenly distracted by the urge to write a post on this blog about how I'm suddenly distracted to write something else. [You know, now that I have this window open and am writing this post, I am thinking of going back to the first one...or write about the whole things on Facebook]
WHY DOES THIS HAPPEN???
I see this tendency in all that I do. Well, most of it. To date, I haven't actually just stopped a massage session because I remembered that I needed to make a phone call or suddenly wanted a piece of cheese. But when I'm by myself, able to construct time the way I want to, it seems that between what I am doing and what I am planning to do next is this incessant voice that the "thing to do next" is somehow always better than what I'm doing now, more so enough that I should just abandon what I'm doing currently.
It happens in yoga and meditation. It happens in cleaning (if anyone ever videotaped me cleaning the house, I'd be afraid to actually see how many times I go in and out of all the rooms). It happens, I dare say, in intimate moments where the sensible part of me is appalled at the fact that I could be thinking of payroll at a time like this?!?!?!
And it happens in writing. Actually, now that I am observing, I've written most of this in just one sitting. I guess when you are so engrossed in a topic, it just spews out. Until you get to a point like this where I'm not sure what to write next. ... [maybe I should go back to that other blog post...?]
I'm in the middle of a few days to myself at the beach. Its a time when I can do literally, whatever I want. This means way too much work for vacation and then giving into impulses that are very far away from work (lets just say I've eaten more doughnuts in two days than I typically eat in an entire year...). But it also means for an extended amount of time I can just really look at myself. This is what those moments of reflection afford us. This is also why we distract ourselves away.
Life is like a constant game of tetherball - I feel continuously flung around, moving away towards something else then being pulled back again to the center and eventually unwinding away again.
Can I see the distraction as just a part of a process? Can I not judge it? Can I revel in the dance?
going to finish that other post now ..