It is funny how the same feelings emerge and re-emerge over and over again. I've started to recognize that each time I go to write or post a blog, this intense churning feeling arises in my stomach and often keeps me from posting.
What is even more funny is I teach classes on this idea of "just sitting down to write," and yet I struggle with it regularly.
And by "funny" I mean ridiculousness in the sense that I need to just get over myself. Life is full of contradictions and I am no exception.
I created 101 Days of Gratitude originally with the idea that it would help me to post more regularly on social media. It worked the past two years though this year it has fallen away far more than before. I haven't posted in many days, weeks...possibly longer!
It has been so long that when I think about posting, guilt comes over me. I hear some voice in me saying, "You started this project and then abandoned it? How hard can it really be to post everyday? Everyone will think you can not follow through with projects..." and on and on
But then a calmer voice inside, one that seems a little more like it is worth listening to, starts to remind me that I am posting about what I am grateful for. It reminds me that I tell everyone else that "you can't do this project wrong." The voice tells me to just post and post often! Hey, I could post twice a day, who cares! That would at least take care of talking myself out of posting because "maybe there is something better to post about."
Now I am rambling. And feeling a little better. Maybe I will go post after all!